Bhagavad Gita Ch18 part 29 on 26 March 2022

Full Transcript(Not Corrected)

auṁ jananīṁ śāradāṁ devīṁ rāma-kṛṣṇaṁ jagad-gurum pāda-padme tayo śrīdhva pranamāmi mūrmukha auṁ vasudeva-sutaṁ devaṁ kamsa-cānūra-martanaṁ devakī paramānandaṁ kṛṣṇaṁ vande jagad-gurum sarvopaniṣad-ogāpo dogdhā gopāla-nandana artha-vatsa-sudhir-bhokta dogdham gītāmṛtaṁ mahat mūkaṁ karoti-vācālam paṅgum laṅgaya te gṛhim yat-kṛpātamaṁ vande paramānanda-mādhavaṁ We have started in our last class the 53rd verse in the 18th chapter wherein certain spiritual qualities have to be acquired in order to progress and to realize God. Through these beautiful verses the Lord is very crystal clearly also defining how and by what method an aspirant can progress and without which an aspirant can never progress without these qualifications and then devotion is necessary. Self-surrender is necessary. The grace of God comes for those who practice them sincerely and also surrender themselves to the Divine Lord and the culmination of the Gita is all about complete self-surrender in the view of the devotees. They call it Sharanagati and in the view of those who follow Jnana Marga, the path of knowledge they call it Aham Brahmasmi but the essence is the same. Whatever be the terminology, words, unless we practice we cannot receive the grace of God and the grace of God is not separate from God. God and His grace like fire and heat, like the sun and its light is absolutely one and the same. So this is the culmination but there is something very special. However much we try we can never become perfect but God considers us as His own children and therefore there is absolutely so to speak there is God doesn't mind. Okay, this is the limit of my child and I will accept whatever He is and that is the end of it. That is what we have to understand. So what are the qualities? In our last class remember it is the 53rd shloka ahankaram balam darpam kamam krodham parigraham vimuchya nirmamah shyamto brahma bhuyaya kalpate So a sadhaka, a spiritual aspirant should strive to reduce the egoism and completely get rid of it in the end. Violence, arrogance, desire, hatred and cautiousness and then the sense of something belongs to me. Not only I am what I am but these are some things which belongs to me. A person should know nothing belongs to anybody. Everything belongs to the Divine Lord and when a person succeeds in attaining to these qualities at least to some extent then what happens his mind becomes absolutely quiet which is called chittavruti nirodha complete cessation of thoughts, accepting the thoughts of God and he becomes absolutely tranquil, shantaha and once he becomes shantaha, tranquil and then the knowledge of brahman, the reflection that I am brahman. I was thinking I was not brahman but now I know I am brahman. There is absolutely no difference between me and brahman and that state is going to be attained. Again we succeed in all these qualities only through the grace of God. That is the important point we have to keep in mind. So we saw first of all ahamkara means egoism, egotism. What is ism? Anything that comes after ego. Ego means aham. Aham means pure consciousness that cannot be removed but anything added. Pure consciousness is the body, pure consciousness is the mind and that means pure consciousness is the entire world and that anything added after ego is ism or tism by whatever name we call it. So a sanyasi that means a spiritual aspirant who is trying to get rid of ahamkara and mamakara, myness and mineness. He is a sanyasin and such a person is sanyasin because he possesses only God and nothing else and such a person is the more we can remove that ism or tism along with that even mineness also reduces to that extent and then this violence, arrogance, desire, hatred, covetousness, everything gets reduced because the whole thing is an outcome of this ism or tism. There is nothing else. That is why the clearest proof for what we are talking about is when a person is in deep sleep and this is what Mandukya Upanishad is deeply exploring. Since there is no identity for a short time during deep sleep with body and mind that means that ism is there, is gone which is manifest in waking and dream is completely gone but ego will be there, pure ego will be there. Of course there is some amount of ignorance is there but I am a body, I am the mind that's gone and along with that the whole entire universe also disappears. So ahamkara is not there, mamakara is not there, only some kind of dullness. I do not have body-mind, I am not the body-mind but I don't know who I am. So that remains and that's why when a person enters into deep sleep he gets up exactly the same person, ignorant, foolish, deluded, having desires, arrogance, egotism etc etc. So what is this ahamkara? First thing is with what a person has. It could be material possessions or it could be one's own. I am a beautiful person, my eyes are beautiful, my hands are beautiful, my legs are very strong, I can throw a cricket ball and I can secure so many runs, I can sing beautifully etc etc. That which is achievable through these physical sense organs and then inside desires will be there, karma will be there. What I have is okay but I wish I had this, I had that and I wish I did not have this, I did not have that etc etc. Of course ultimately fear of change, fear of losing youth, fear of losing beauty, fear of losing other people paying attention to us, these are all what we call pure outcome, the offshoots of egotism or egoism. So this is ahamkara and mamakara, both go together and sometimes mamakara is not there but ahamkara is there and that is what is manifest in the deep sleep and a person has to strive to get rid of that. Then balam. Balam means certain strength. So everybody has a strength in some respect. Some can talk well, some can write well, some can sing well, some can listen very well, some can appreciate very well. Do you think everybody can appreciate? No, that's why you are attracted to some people who appreciate you and they are very enthusiastically appreciating you and you are naturally drawn because you feel I am very valuable and the other fellow doesn't consider me very valuable because he's not appreciating me but this person appreciates me. Appreciation in a positive sense is very very necessary both for us to give to others and for the others also to give to us otherwise a child will grow up mentally, physically crippled. So this is called power of positive thinking but it should be only directed towards something very positive. It should never be misused especially to harm either other people or to harm ourselves also. Even in this harming there are two varieties. Some people they are intent on harming other people. We see it every day but some people they do not harm other people that they harm themselves by harboring negative thoughts, impure thoughts, desires which are impure, which are of the nature of binding. So we should be able to find out. You see one example is spirituality is good not only because there is God and that's our true nature but even for a worldly person spirituality is very good because that is the greatest strength, greatest security. Here is a person who can withstand the ups and downs and you know these ups and downs are inevitable in anybody's life. So naturally everybody has something special which others do not have and we have to be generous. After all we don't lose anything by appreciating what is good. Not only that if we do not appreciate what is good in others we get the karma phala. Others will not appreciate us and just as we feel we give pain to others others also that pain through others comes back to us manyfold with compound interest. So it's very wonderful. But sometimes the palam and most of the time it is there but it is backed, it is strengthened, it encourages by karma that means desire by raga and even here positive desire is good and positive attachment is also good. Attachment to good scriptures, attachment to guru, attachment to good people, great people, ideal people in any field of life, great books in any field of life. They're all uplifting, ennobling and always keeps our mind very high. So that is very important. That's why it is not a harmful thing if our strength is, our enthusiasm is backed up, is fueled by karma, desire and raga attachment. But as I said we should not, we should allow them to give us, make us enthusiastic, strengthen us, energize us and look forward to accomplish certain things but not in not making ourselves slaves to them and that is where the good lord is so beautifully telling us keep all these things. There is nothing wrong but do not become a slave. If we can remember let me not become a doll, a puppet in the hands of karma and raga then not only I will be a very happy person, positive person, I will be surging forward with leap by leaps and bounds growing in spiritual strength. Then you know dharpam means arrogance. Our problem is the moment somebody has got some power it that most likely it contributes to arrogance and there Hiram Krishna also gives us a guidance be arrogant. Every spiritual aspirant must be arrogant. How? A child if it is hurt by somebody becomes very arrogant. It cannot retaliate but it tells I have my mother, I have my father and they love me and the moment they come to know you are doing this to me they will come and beat you black and blue. So I depend upon God. I depend upon the divine mother. I have nothing to fear. I will go about. Do you want to harm me? Do it. You will see what my divine mother is going to do to you. This kind of dharpa not only it is not negative, not only it is not counterproductive but it is the most productive and everybody has to develop this one. So that is what is called either the ahamkara of knowledge or the ahamkara of a devotion and to speak can one give up ahamkara? No. Until one realizes God one has to develop those things, accept those things. Hiram Krishna says you cut a people tree today to the roots, next day or after two days you will see new sprouts are coming because the root cannot be so easily uprooted. So especially I even every spiritual aspirant when this person has progressed to some great extent he should be called a sannyasin because he acknowledges God alone exists. My goal is to reach God and I will not care for anything else. I fix in my sights only on God. Such a person is a real sannyasi. So even a sannyasi every sannyasi is given certain gifts but it's a true sannyasi doesn't want to misuse them to flaunt to them. So he does not use these powers to control the devotees, to control other people and much less to harm other people. In other words he can never manipulate. On the other hand his attitude will be purely spiritual. What is that attitude? Oh lord everything belongs to you. So oh lord please help me to attain to that state. So whenever a sannyasi you and me who are striving at least that's what we think to move towards God we must be sometimes success will come. It should not go to our head. Why? Because Shankaracharya says here that if anybody becomes arrogant what happens he becomes very happy. Arrogance comes from produces happiness and because of success in some particular field and for that there must be talent and talented person alone has a right to become arrogant and it gives tremendous joy because truly that person is able to do something very successfully. Then what happens? That pleased person is what Shankara says is a person becomes what happens becomes arrogant. You be happy that's wonderful but never become arrogant. Arrogant means are you looking down upon other people that I have this talent. I am superior. You are inferior. That feeling should not be there and then Shankara continues and as soon as this arrogance comes and the avidya ignorance moha delusion covers that fellow and what happens he loses sight of what is right what is wrong and he does what is wrong thinking all the time I'm only I'm perfectly all right. I'm doing what is right. Being mindful he will first of all look down upon everybody whereas a humble person that looks upon everybody as a manifestation of the divine mother. One should not try to practice spiritual disciplines without becoming humble and the more one practices the more one should become humble. If that humbleness is not manifest and it will be very manifest to us and much more to other people then we know that it is the divine mother's grace that we are able to move forward and yet acknowledge her grace. Acknowledging grace means I could not have achieved it by myself is only by their grace I can achieve it and since this person who becomes arrogant he thinks that there is nobody equal to him and then if somebody doesn't respect he doesn't want to respect others but owe unto the fellow who doesn't respect him but who is a true sanyasi the person he becomes akinchana. I am nothing. This world is a manifestation of God. It is created by God. It is maintained by God. I am part of the world. I come from him. He maintains. He works through me. I am a puppet. Nothing in this world belongs to me. I cannot give anything to God because I don't have anything. I am also belonging to him only. When a person has this kind of sense then everything that he does including his deep sleep breath is only a great marvelous glorious worship of the Lord which in one of the hymns Shankara himself says nidra samadhi sthithi. Such a person if his legs are moving it is called circumambulating. If his hands are moving he is performing whisper service to the Lord. If he is speaking something it is he is hymning the Lord through hymns created by other people but if he happens to eat food that is the Lord who is the food, who is eating the food, who is the offerer of food pramarpanam but if he happens to sleep nidra samadhi sthithi. Sleep is nothing other than samadhi because this person's knowledge is this sleep is the oneness with the divine Lord. So a sannyasi is one who doesn't need anybody's appreciation, anybody's recognition. Why? Because of three reasons. So one reason is that he knows I am Brahman. I am perfect. I am infinite. So there is nothing besides me. So I don't need anybody's. If somebody is not praising, if somebody is not appreciating, I don't lose anything. I am more than self-sufficient in myself. Second reason he knows everything belongs to God. Nothing belongs to himself. The body, the mind, everything belongs to God and from that standpoint also he is not arrogant at all. Third standpoint is that even the body, the mind, this all belongs to the prakruti. guna guneshvartante iti matva nasajyate. I have nothing to do. The body, the mind, the world are the products of guna, prakruti, ishwaras maya, daivi maya and therefore I have nothing to do. So I have nothing to take credit. I am also not indebted to anybody. So then he also knows I am akarta. I am abhokta. I neither am I doer, nayamahante, nahanyate. Neither I kill nor anyone is killed because there is no action of killing or being killed. Even the state God kills, God is killed. It's a stupid statement because one who kills, he cannot be the killer and the killed at the same time. After killing himself he claims I am the killer. Who is if you are killed? How can you claim that you are the killer? Because birth and death is only a cinema on the screen of maya. It is not true at all. So that is what tarpayee. Then sannyasi must be free from what next characteristic? Kama. What is kama? So kama means desire. Can we really truly give up kama? No, you cannot give up. Why? Because if there is a body, there is hunger, there is thirst, there is the need to breathe, there is the need to rest, there is the need when disease comes to take medicine. It is the very nature of the body and mind that there will be some desires. Then what is the way to get out? There are two types of desires. Binding desire, non-binding desire. That's what Bhagwan himself at crystal clearly declared and we have dealt with that. Dharma aviruddhaha tamo asmi bharatar shabha. Oh Arjuna, I am desired which is not opposed to righteousness. Which means which will take me, which will take you and everybody to God. That kama, that is desiring God, progressing, desiring progress in spiritual life, desiring to reduce all worldly desires, desiring to reduce raga dvesha, likes and dislikes, that is not at all binding desire. Anything that produces ism, tism, binds us more, that is dharma, what is called viruddha kama. It is opposed to dharma. It is a binding desire. We should be discriminative about these things. So Sriram Krishna gives a beautiful illustration. So there is a child and his dad has given him a new cloth and then he's very proud and if somebody comes, darling will you give me? I said no. My daddy has given it to me. I am not going to give. It looks as though he is intensely attached to it. He is very proud of it but after a few minutes either voluntarily he just tears it off and rolls it on the ground and runs naked or if some stranger is passing and in his hand he sees a toy or a chocolate, immediately runs. You take this new piece of cloth. You give me that doll. I want to play. A child is as much attached as unattached. Actually I have witnessed a beautiful this scene in front of my eyes. Once I attended a Durga festival in London and then so many devotees were there and children belonging to different families were just making a ruckus, playing. Two children almost of the same age, two boys, they quarreled with each other and one gave the beating to the other fellow and that weak fellow, he went crying to his mother and they were very close friends. So the mother took the baby and consoled him and I was watching this. After two, not even five minutes is over, immediately that fellow who was crying, he saw this the other fellow playing. Immediately he came, joined, they became buddies and they started playing. What a blessed thing. This is what Sri Ramakrishna is telling. Whereas in our case, we cling and cling and cling more and that is the real cause of suffering. So a sannyasin is one who has given up desire, karma, in the sense that it is whatever is binding, he will give up. What is non-binding? Well, of course, he can go for begging and when we go for begging, supposing he goes for begging, the food the person obtained from one family is quite refreshing, very tasty to his liking or even maybe suitable for his stomach and the next day, yesterday, my mother Annapurna gave me this beautiful food. It is not only tasty, I feel very energetic, very healthy. I wish I get that kind of food. This kind of karma can be cherished. How do we call it non-binding? Because if he's a true sannyasin, he can only say, mother, bhavati bhiksham dehi. Whatever you give, that's acceptable to me. It is not suitable for my stomach or for my tongue. It doesn't matter. What you deign to give me, I will gladly accept it. That is why bhavati, bhagavati, bhiksham dehi, grant me the bhiksha. Now, there was an incident. So, what happened? There was a person and this subject actually should come under accumulation, parigraha, but I am forestalling it. So, the sannyasin came to Dakshineswar and he was a very sincere person and seeing that some people were attracted and they started bringing presents. Slowly, this greediness entered, this attachment entered. He started accumulating. Shri Ramakrishna immediately went and warned him, sadhu, sadhan, you are accumulating. Your mother is trying you, testing you. Yes, you are a good sadhu. I know that. Otherwise, I would never have advised you. So, you be very careful about it and then you go and do what is necessary you do. That is absolutely fine, but beyond what is necessary because tomorrow if you leave, then you are not going to carry all these pots and pans and other things. The funny thing is what he was accumulating some mud pots. The value of mud pots even in those days were the least, but you know for a sannyasi even to get a loincloth, a new loincloth, a silk loincloth and a multi, what you call, designer loincloth. Ah, what a marvelous thing. I don't know. Just now the idea came. You have to appreciate my creativeness. I don't, it's not that I expect from you. I know you don't do that for my own good, but I expect you to do that. Anyway, don't shout now. So, this will come naturally, but the sannyasin will say, oh mother, whatever you give, I know it is for my good and that's absolutely fine. Very good for sannyasins. What about a householder? Once M asked Sairam Krishna, what about earning money? Categorically, Sairam Krishna gave him advice. Yes, a householder is not going to be maintained by other people. Only three ashramas, the brahmacharis, the vanaprasthis and the sannyasins, according to our old system, you know, they are supposed to be supported by householders. Nowadays, they don't support, but sannyasins, they do support. There is no doubt about it and also old age homes. Many people support, there is no doubt. Poor students also they support, but that ashrama system is reduced to only two now, householders and sannyasins. Anyway, so what about earning money? He says, first of all, the money should be earned, honestly, and every householder must. That is why, bhootyai na pramaditabhyam. Taittiriya Upanishad categorically commands, if a householder neglects earning, accumulating more wealth, he will be committing a sin. This is a commandment. But then, the next commandment is, he has to support all the other ashramas. That means, he must support people who need help. Helpless people must be, poor people must be, deserving people must be, starving people must be, and people who do not afford, who can't afford cloths or money, school fees, they must be completely forded. If any wretched fellow, householder, doesn't do it, or does it, what is called peanut contribution, he doesn't understand that, if this person does it, if I do it, it is not a loss, it is a most wisest investment. Because it comes in the form of punya, he will enjoy the next life. Who knows, he may become also a great monk. No doubt, everybody is going to become a great monk. So, this is what Shri Ramakrishna's advice. Then, having earned, what should be done? It should be used properly in three ways. So, he says Bhagavat Seva, in the service of God, that means temples, worship, arranging holy company, arranging devotional singing, pilgrimage, etc., etc. Then he says Sadhu Seva. There are people who are wandering, depending upon God. Of course, we may not recognize, everybody may not be taking a monk's life for that purpose, but it's none of our business. Our business is, here is a person, truly he doesn't have anything, he wants a little bit of food, a bit of cloth, let me give whatever, if I can afford to give it, that's absolutely fine, or just a handful of food which you are eating, you reduce if necessary, and give it to him. If he gets 10 handfuls of food from 10 houses, then his stomach will be filled, he will bless you, even if he doesn't bless you, whatever he could do, japa, meditation he does, it will come back to you, because karma phala has to come back. So, second service of the sadhus. Third, Dharidra Seva, Narayana Seva. Poor people are deserving people, helpless people, there are so many in this world. For example, now, how many people are suffering in Ukraine, all because of the wrong decisions taken by some arrogant people. Anyway, I don't want to enter into all those things, but there are people who deserve it, and if we can help, it's fine. If we want to help, if we have a desire to help, a lot of opportunity will be there, there is no doubt about it. So, this is all about karma is good, but it must be not opposing to dharma, dharma virudhaha, then there is a karma, binding karma, non-binding karma. Try to give up binding desire and adopt it to non-binding desire. Then there are two types of lifestyles, householders and monks. I'm talking only about spiritual aspirants, not to anybody. So, householders, it is their duty to earn money righteously, use it in spiritual activities, service of the poor, service of the holy people, and if it is a sannyasin, so you just receive what you require and bless people, blessings, prayers. If you can tell something, a good advice at the time of receiving bhiksha, or recite some stotram, or sing a beautiful bhajan, or you can even chant some vedic hymn, or even silently pray for that person because it is our duty to do that. When we receive particular somebody, this is all about karma. The next is krodha. Krodha means anger. Now, what is anger? Are there two things called, one is desire, another is anger. You know in Hindu spiritual lore, it is said there are six internal enemies, kama, krodha, lobha, moha, madha, matsarya. But are there really six enemies or one implacable enemy dressing at different times with six different dresses and that is what Hindu scriptures tell us. There is first this isamartism, egotism comes in the form of kama, desire. The moment you say I am the body, I want to be healthy, I want to be safe, I want to satisfy all the cravings of my five sense organs, I want to accumulate so that I can use the same thing in the future, etc., etc. So, if it is frustrated, if the desire is not fulfilled, it is definitely, there is not the least bit of doubt is going to transform itself like maheshashra transforms into anger, krodha. Thwarted, frustrated, unfulfilled desire turns into anger, expressed or unexpressed. Many times we cannot express because the other person is powerful, the person is capable of hitting us, harming us and stopping our promotions, our boss for example. So many obstructions are there. But inside this is boiling. Now this about krodha, frustrated. So should a spiritual aspirant go on suffering from it? No, because a frustrated desire is going to cause anger, krodha. There is no doubt about it. That is why we find out why you are angry and find out why it is coming out. That is what if we cannot find out, you pay heavy amount of money and go to a psychologist or psychiatrist and he will parrot it out for you and so if we can find it out, it's very economical also. Always we find that there is a desire and first without understanding what is the frustrated desire and then getting rid of it, not allowing it to be frustrated either by fulfilling in a legitimate way or by trying to get getting rid of it. No way one can remove anger. Anger is in a way of speaking, anger etc. Anger, greediness, delusion, arrogance, jealousy. These are other five expressions. They cannot be removed if I don't have a desire. For example, I don't have a desire to learn abstract maths. Therefore, I will never be jealous of Einstein or anybody. If I don't want to become chief minister, prime minister, I will never be jealous of them but hundreds of the others who want to attain to that state to replace him with themselves, they will be cherishing jealousy and then they will go on getting angry and they go on spreading all sorts of scandals. This horrible drama is going on all over the world, in every country, in every society, even in monasteries, in everywhere. This Mahamaya comes in the form of the desire in a very subtle way from inside without anybody's like creeping like a snake without anybody's notice and manifest like Mahishasura in so many other forms. So you must be first of all be what is called aware that I am angry. Most of the time we justify and say long after our anger is subsided, not removed but subsided, we come to know we have, oh yes, I was very angry. Yes, what can I do? I was possessed. That is a useless excuse. By the time it has done tremendous amount of damage first to oneself then of course later on to other people. So it has to be what is called controlled. It has to be brought under control. What is the way? Analyze, objectify. What is this? This is a symptom. Anger is a symptom. A symptom indicates Linga, Suchate that there is something deep inside which you are not able to see and I am only indicating an outer expression of that deeply hidden thing. So if you have got headache, it is indicating something. If you have fever, it is indicating something. If you have got stomach ache, it is indicating something. If you have loose motions, it is indicating something. So don't read only these external symptoms. The only way to objectify. That is the final solution and spiritual life starts with objectifying. That's what holy mother says. Stop finding fault with others and start finding fault with yourself and already we have honed our expertise in finding other people's faults and now it will come in very handy. Only we have to change the subject which is our own self. Stand in front of a mirror and try to find out all the faults. That will be wonderful. Let me give you two examples in Paramahamsa Ramakrishna's life. First is Latu Maharaj. You know Swami Adbhutananda later on. Latu Maharaj. Another one Swami Brahmananda. Earlier he was called Raka. Now both of them were in Dakshineshwar. So one day, you know, Sairam Krishna forged an individual relationship with each one of his disciples. Now what is called common relationship. There is a common relationship which is you are all devotees. But so far as spiritual guidance is concerned only a specific individual relationship. Now what happened? One day this Sairam Krishna's relationship with Latu Maharaj is master and servant and Sairam Krishna's relationship with Rakhal is father and son, mother and son. Now Rakhal Maharaj, Latu Maharaj, Gurubhai is both are of almost of the same age. Both were wrestlers and one day Rakhal Maharaj was lying down. Sairam Krishna just probably created this scenario. He said, hey Rakhal, I want to smoke. So please prepare some tobacco and bring it. Either this or you prepare some betel leaf. I forget what it is. So Rakhal Maharaj, he was lying on the bed. Simply he merely said, I don't know how to prepare and he turned his back. Sairam Krishna smiled and said, hey, for this you do you need to have a college degree. Just what is there, take few leaves and prepare it. So I don't know, he turned and this Latu Maharaj was watching and he got angry. My Guru is telling and this fellow has the temerity to refuse it. So he shouted. He is telling means Latu Maharaj never said Sairam Krishna or he is telling. Go and prepare and Rakhal Maharaj not even looked at him. He said if you get a headache because of that you go and prepare and give it to him. That will serve the purpose. And Latu Maharaj became fiery and Sairam Krishna was smiling. A smile was playing on his lips. Immediately he called his nephew Ramlal. Hey Ramlal, please come here. This is what happened. Now tell me whose devotion to me is greater and Ramlal Dada immediately he said because he was a very intelligent person. Rakhal's devotion to you is much more and much intense, much closer, intimate than Latu's. Hearing this Latu Maharaj just burst in terrible anger because according to him obeying Guru is the only sign of true what is called love for the Guru and then immediately Sairam Krishna he became grave and said my boy should you show anger in front of your Guru. Really there is a rule in front of one's Guru one should never get angry. Why? Because if a disciple gets angry he can do anything like a disciple of Swami Trigunathi Taranda. He must have been frustrated. He must have got angry. He brought a bomb and threw it on the Guru's face and then he also died. Guru also died after a few days. This happened in San Francisco I think in 1940. So Latu Maharaj started weeping. He understood by Sairam Krishna's grace. He said please forgive me. I will never again get angry. Now what is the point of this story? It is first of all Rakhal Maharaj's devotion that I am a child. I can refuse my parents and they will not get angry. If they get angry I carry fig for them because they will never harm me because I know that I am their child and they are my parents. Child can get angry but parents can never get angry. He knew it but a servant cannot afford to do that. That is the most wonderful thing. But even more important that in the presence of the Guru if somebody is disobeying what is your headache? You do what best you can do and you get angry to prove yourself. Maybe there is a hidden desire. My devotion is far superior to your devotion because I am ready to obey my Guru. Whatever expression he gives to his wishes. So that may be Lakshmi Maharaj's attitude. But in any case to get angry and without one's control and to express it outside especially in the presence of monks, senior people, parents and respectable people. It is the height of what is called uncivilization, uncultured attitude. Now the second even more wonderful. Sri Ramakrishna's Guru Totapuri he claimed that he had Nirvikalpa Samadhi. Of course by mother's grace I have no doubt he had it but it was not complete because when you close your mind you are merged in Brahman but when your mind starts functioning if you don't see the same Brahman everywhere that needs to be completed. It is an incomplete realization. So Totapuri did not realize it. So he thought he would go and stay in Dakshinath for only three days. But then the mother out of her infinite grace kept him for nearly 11 months because for his own good. Because his sadhana has to be complete. One day Ramakrishna was giving teaching to his disciple Ramakrishna and then this Ramakrishna had a habit at dawn and dusk he will be clapping his hands and saying Gaya, Ganga, Gayatri, Geeta, Guru, Bhagavata, Bhakta, Bhagwan, Sri Krishna, Govinda like that he has a set formula and he went on adding to that formula also as and when the occasion arises. So Totapuri used to ridicule. Are you preparing some chapatis like that? Then Ramakrishna said I'm taking my mother's name and you are calling I'm preparing chapatis. Totapuri didn't understand. One day he was in a teaching mode and then what is called lecturing mode and he went on telling you know whatever you see, you smell, you touch, you taste and you do through your body, mind all Brahman, all Brahman went on waxing eloquent and these Naga Sanyasin to which Totapuri belonged they have great respect for fire and they call it Dhuni fire, sacred fire. That means there is sacred fire there is also non-sacred fire. That is what I have to understand. The moment you say this is holy fire, this is unholy fire. I don't see any such thing. You put anything in unholy fire or holy fire both will work exactly in the same way, reduce everything to ashes. Anyway he was talking and Totapuri has this peculiar reverence for the fire which is Brahman, another form which is absolute truth but there is nothing called unholy fire and then this lecture was going on. A temple servant came and he wanted a bit of fire. He took it from here and he what is called lighted up his churad about to go then Totapuri noticed it at that time when the servant was about to go away he took out his iron tongs and about to beat him and Totapuri was so strong if he really takes into his head to beat this what is called lean and thin temple servant would have fainted right away if not dead. Seeing this, witnessing this, Ramakrishna started fell down on the earth started laughing uproariously. Totapuri didn't understand. What is so funny? Why are you laughing? Ramakrishna said first I will repeat in Bengali. I'm seeing the extent of your Brahmagnan. Just now you are saying everything is Brahman. You have forgotten temple servant is also Brahman. Fire is also Brahman. There is no difference between temple servant and fire and you are about to beat him. You became very angry and the worst thing is you did not even realize that you are angry. Totapuri was astounded what I who attained to Nirvikalpa Samadhi not aware what my own mind is doing that it is cherishing the desire and the desire is frustrated and it turned into anger. I was not even aware what type of spirituality is that where I am not aware what my mind is doing behind my back or in front of my back right in front of the eyes of my eyes. What is the problem? Getting anger angry is a secondary issue but not knowing that one is getting angry. Unconsciously getting angry that means I have become a slave to my emotions and as I said anger is thwarted frustrated desire. What is the desire? This fire is sacred and it should be used only for particular purpose not for lighting a maturat etc. That is unholy activity. So this division I don't want anybody to touch my fire and use it for this kind of purposes that is my desire and that became frustrated and I'm about to beat. Totapuri great soul. He realized and then he said you are right. I will never again allow this anger to come. What is the way? I will never allow any desire to come into my mind and Sharda and Jeevan Maharaj was remarking there afterwards nobody had ever seen him getting angry. He learned his lesson. Like this so many mistakes were committed. Many of them are not recorded. Ultimately a time came when he thought just now we discussed I am not the body. My body doesn't belong to me. He wanted to drown that body and then he went to commit suicide in the Ganga and we know the story there was no water but the mother illumined him and said you don't belong to you. Your body doesn't belong to you. Your mind doesn't belong to you. Your spiritual practice doesn't belong to you. The desire for spiritual life is the very this wonderful human body is given by me to you. This desire for spiritual progress is given by you to me. I brought you into contact with a holy man and he gave you appropriate teaching and I removed all these kama, kruta, lobha, moha, mata, matsarya all these obstacles from behind and you never acknowledged me, never gave me appreciation or thanks. Oh mother without your grace I would never have been able to overcome these things. Todapuri learned his lesson. He said Ma for the first time he said Ma it is your grace. You could have punished me but you through this you opened your eyes and then you became fully enlightened. Open the eyes brahman. Seeing eyes with open eyes. Seeing brahman with open eyes. Close your eyes that is brahman. Waking state brahman. Dream state brahman. Deep sleep state brahman. Can one have observe, see, witness brahman in deep sleep state? Yes. Swami Turiyanandaji had given a categorical reply and answering a devotee's question he said that a brahmagnani is a constant continuous witness to the waking dream as well as dreamless. How is it possible? How is it possible? We are also having witness but only thing is we don't identify ourselves with the witnessing state. That is our problem but how is it possible? Because the Atman is never undergoing these three states. Then what is it that is undergoing? It is the gross body and mind and subtle body and then the causal body and they are undergoing the changes but the Atman ever remains a witness illumining and lending support and making it go through these exercises three states but ever remains a continuous witness because how is it proved? Because I was in the waking state. I was in the dream state. I was in the deep sleep state. Who can say? Who can dare to issue this statement? Only a person who is witnessing it continuously. So this is the ultimate goal we have to realize. Krodha that is what did I say it is another manifestation of desire only and then if it is if somehow it is suppressed then it becomes what is called lova, greediness. Parigraha. That is where we come to the next spiritual quality. Parigraha. So Parigraha means accepting something. Is it wrong to accept? Can we ever live without accepting? No. Accepting is fine. What is not fine? Taking is fine. So long as we give. Life is all about giving and taking. This is a law of life and he who cannot give he cannot take. He who cannot offer he cannot receive. That is why even for my own good the moment I give whatever I have and something new, something better, something far refined will rush into me. That applies to physical wealth, intellectual wealth, moral wealth and spiritual wealth. That is why as soon as a person progresses he will have a desire to discuss these things with other people. It is not discussion. It is giving out. My brother these are my efforts. This is the results of what I have understood by mother's grace and I am telling you if you are intelligent you can accept them and this is what we have we need to do. So this Parigraha means accepting is fine but accepting without giving is not fine. So there are certain rules and regulations. What are the rules and regulations? Accept what is needed and give it double fold or threefold or hundredfold whatever is possible and take only what is necessary. Don't take what is not necessary and even if you take if you have something to give back give it and if you don't have something to give back then you pray for that person. This was embodied in that priceless teaching of holy mother. Those who have in the form of wealth or anything physical or external give it but even if a teacher has knowledge give it freely not always for fees. There may be poor students but suppose a person doesn't have then pray bless them and talk with them sweetly. What do you lose? There are so many ways of giving back. Prayer is one of the best means. There are some matters and beautiful things which we need to understand with regard to this Parigraha with some examples and we will discuss about it in our next class. Om Vasudeva Sutam Devam Kamsa Janura Martanam Devaki Paramanandam Krishnam Vande Jagadguru May Ramakrishna, Holy Mother and Swami Vivekananda bless us all with Bhakti.